MemberMarch 9, 2021 at 9:03 am20 Forum Points
Log after tomorrow.
One main character
One Main location
P1Rooney wakes up out of bed grabs his recorder and speaks into it as he looks at himself in the bathroom mirror.
A1. On a nightstand, a hand reaches for a recorder.
A2. Sitting up on the bed Rooney puts on his glasses
A3. In front of a mirror, he stares at himself.
A4. He opens his mouth to get a better look.
A5. He continues to check himself out in the mirror.
P2-3. He talks about the project. How a rift opened over an inn in the Midwest and the government closed it offed. How he was let in by the government.
A1. A roadside Inn is shown.
A2. Space around it begins to bend a bit. People are fleeing from it
A3. The entire building encased in a bubble of time.
A4. The government has set up a barricade around the building.
P4. He sets up his instruments and does some tests. When he’s done, he goes to bed an old man.
A1. Inside the rift, Rooney can clearly see the Inn.
A2. Inside the Inn, he finishes setting up his instruments.
A3-4. He goes around the inn scanning the place
A5. His scanner beeps green.
A6. He removes his helmet revealing how’s really old.
P5. He wakes up a young man in his twenties. He’s too busy enjoying his strength.
A1. Rooney, now in his twenties, gets out of bed and stretches.
A2. He pauses due to the sudden realization that something is off.
A3. He runs in front of the bathroom mirror.
A4. He studies himself
A5. He begins to laugh to himself.
A6. He’s back in the bedroom doing pushups.
P6. He wakes up as a baby. He cries in his bed.
A1. Close up for a baby’s face
A2. The camera pulls back to reveal a baby version of Rooney is crying in his bed
A3. He begins to cry!
P7. As a teen, he accidentally smashes his instruments damaging them in the process
A1. Rooney is at his desk frantically writing notes
A2. In a big huff, he tosses all of his papers into the air.
A3. He flips over his desk.
A4. He kicks over the main piece of tech knocking it off
A5. The device is broken
A6. He looks at it in horror.
P8. Back in the bathroom as a middle-aged man, he talks about how he wants to go home.
A1. Walks out of the bathroom with his recorder in hand.
A2. He walks over to a poorly mended version of his machine.
A3. He turns it on.
A4. Nothing happens
A5. It begins to run.
A6. It shuts down once more.
A7. He raises his recorder to speak into it once more, stating how at least he has all of the time in the world.
ModeratorMarch 10, 2021 at 1:41 am
Hey @rakeemnelson ,
I like that you have really thought out all the visuals/panels, I’m interested to see how you will denote for the reader that man at every age shown is the same person. Also what is the instruments/machine that get broken is? and what does it measure?
I am sure most of this will be solved in the scripting process, but currently I am a bit confused by what is actually happening in the story, is he aging backward? aging more quickly and being reset every day? or is it random and these are each different ages every new day? is he stuck in a loop or being transported to different ages in his life?
Why did the government send him there? is he supposed to be fixing the problem? or studying it?
Also, I might have asked this before, sorry if I am repeating myself, but are there other people in this story? involved or or not?
And how much of the story telling will be exposition? through thoughts of the main character, or him talking to himself or the recorder?
I am very interested to see how this story is revealed to the viewer/reader.
Thanks again for posting!
D Alley, the Redheadeded