MemberApril 15, 2020 at 10:44 am20 Forum PointsCBS Forum Member: Forum Acolyte
George Dawkins II: A pretty safe run of the mill super hero story. Aside from the character choice, what will make this different and more interesting then other super hero stories? Aside from her powers, how will you make the reader like Lavatasha, or care? I know there’s already a lot going on for eight pages, but I feel like it’s missing something, character wise, that makes the event more meaningful. It feels like there isn’t anything at stake.
Andrés Briano: Aw man, that twist really got me. Makes the whole story very enjoyable, especially if it’s done in a super serious pretentious way.. XD cliche things that would normally make a story bad would only make the pun even funnier. This certainly is a story I might be interested in contributing as an artist. Only things I would try to change is perhaps the name/title. It should have something that very very stuttley suggest something off or funny about the story, but reads like a normal fantasy title to those not expecting it. Another thing to think about is if a lot of the information will be conveyed via (dramatic) nnarration boxes or quick events/dialog
philipspace: Sounds pretty good so far. I guess it’s old school adventure like feel?
jholder12: Also very good. Something about this doesn’t come off are boring somehow, like it’s still very light hearted all the way through.