ModeratorMay 16, 2020 at 6:25 pm
Thanks for the feedback!
Addressing your points, I’m thinking that maybe after Black Ice breaks into the bank there could be a baby crying in a stroller that he notices which could also qualify as a bit of foreshadowing.
I’ll definitely work on fleshing out the description of the bank on page 1. On page 4, maybe Black Ice could be freezing the vault/safe door to make it brittle and Lavatasha stops him after she comes in by causing lava to erupt from the ground in front of him.
My main goal is to hopefully continue this story by introducing Lavatasha and her status as a popular superhero here while leaving readers with a mystery they may want to find out in a later comic.